


Divine Damnation

by Ruunkur



Series: Divine Ripples [3]
Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Dimitri's trying, M/M, Therapy is even better when you have dreams that give you PTSD, in which Dimitri actually gets help, no beta we die like Glenn, therapy is good for you
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-12
Updated: 2020-03-12
Packaged: 2021-02-28 17:06:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,556
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23120701
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ruunkur/pseuds/Ruunkur
Summary: In a world where dreams tell you of your past life in reverse, Dimitri always wondered if things could be fixed. And he wanted to know if love could survive the test of time.
Relationships: Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd/Felix Hugo Fraldarius
Series: Divine Ripples [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1659364
Kudos: 22





	Divine Damnation

**Author's Note:**

> Look, I promise the next couple weren't be as. Terribly interlocking as these first three.
> 
> In fact, I still have two more fics in this series that utilize the fucking kitchen scene for Rodrigue. So they're going to be written... later. Cause I am so sick of that scene. I am so sick of it.
> 
> I love Dimitri, but boy does he need some help.
> 
> Fun fact: There are songs I associate with each of these fics. Dimitri is "You Said You'd Grow Old With me". Felix's is "Good For You" from the Dear Even Hansen musical. Sylvain is "It's Alright by Mother Mother". At least, those are the songs I listened to the most when writing these fics.
> 
> TBH, I had a lot of fun on deciding who is doing what in the current and how everyone may have died(based off a Claude Run I did, loosely). Also, I only loosely(so loosely) edited this while on lunch at work.

_”Felix, if there is anything-”_

_“The boar wishes to wear a crown made of the bones of people. He continues this useless march against Edelgard, knowing that-”_

_Words are cut off and Felix huffs out a sigh. They had seen Edelgard’s true face not more than two days ago and now…_

_“Felix-”_

_The man whirled, hand on the hilt of his blade. “Call me by that name again and I will cut you down where you stand. I will not follow a mad king into battle.” He turned at the words and Dimitri reached out, his hands curling in the air._

_The ghosts rose up after Felix left, voices chattering, chiding, comforting. And Glenn, standing before him, fire licking at his skin. Dimitri ran a hand through his hair, watching as the ghosts moved and he nodded, an understanding…_

_Seeing Felix on the battlefield, the man raising a hand and Dimitri’s last remaining friend plummeting towards her death. The clearest memory he had since his argument with Felix in the Monastery. Rushing forward, his lance swinging, hitting flesh and words, soft._

_“I love you.”_

Dimitri turned over in the bed, listening to the breathing of the others in the room, unable to shake the remnants of the dream from his mind. They were traveling, moving back towards Fodlan and everything that he had left behind ten years ago.

“Are you asleep?”

Dimitri jumped when he heard Claude’s voice, turning over in the bed to see the man sitting on the couch, playing a game on his phone.

“I’ll take that as a no. Are you thinking about the past?”

Dimitri sat up, running a hand over his face. “How do you deal with the dreams?”

Claude frowned, scratching the side of his head as he set his phone to the side. “Didn’t Linhardt give you a bunch of coping mechanisms?”

Dimitri shifted, adjusting himself on the bed. “Yes, he did. But, you… never talk about them. How do you deal with them, personally?”

Claude let out a sigh, shaking his head. “I had a lot more years that were more or less peaceful after the war with Edelgard. There’s the idea that it’s harder to adjust if you died violently-”

Dimitri winced at the comment, Claude’s hands in his lap.

“-but, other than that… I mean, the war memories are the worst. I can’t imagine…” he trailed off, turning his gaze to look at their sleeping companion.

“You had amazing aim. To aim from across the battlefield. I never saw it coming.”

Dimitri shifted, Claude glancing away and clearing his throat. “That was… sort of the point.”

“Was there a… particular reason that moment, or was it just…”

“You killed Felix.”

Dimitri looked up, seeing the hard look in Claude’s eyes.

“I… promised Sylvain that I would protect Felix.”

“Felix…” Dimitri frowned, his gaze drifting from Claude.

“Yep, Felix. How can I not promise a dying man to protect his best friend?” Claude stood up from the chair, stretching. “Move over, I want to lay down.”

Dimitri opened his mouth but shifted in the bed, rolling over to lay on his side. The pair had avoided the talk of past lives, beyond very simple facts. Dedue slept on the second bed, Claude making himself comfortable.

“You know, they still believed you could pull through.”

Dimitri froze at those words, his gaze locked on the window. “I don’t know-”

“Sylvain and Felix. They thought you were a lost cause, but they still cared for you. Sure, Felix came to the Golden Deer to keep an eye on Sylvain. And he was… horrified when he found out Sylvain was dead. Spent three weeks staring at nothing. When Byleth tried to keep him out of Gronder field, he about lost his shit. I know you knew them, when you were younger. What… went wrong?”

Dimitri shifted, closing his eyes. “Are you sure this is the right idea?”

Claude shifted, pulling the blanket so it covered both of them. “Can’t get cold feet on me now! We’re a day from the border of Fodlan and a three day drive to Rodrigue’s home, was it? Maybe two, if we switch off who drives.

“Why help us?” Dimitri asked.

Claude let out a sigh, shifting once more. Dimitri had tucked his bit of the sheets under his chin, surprised when he felt a hand rest on his shoulder.

“The past is the past. If we keep letting it weigh us down, then there’s nothing for us in the future. You needed help, ten years ago. We may not be on…” Claude paused, searching for the words he wanted.

“Best of terms?” Dimitri offered.

He sighed. “I suppose. I think, in any other life, we would have been able to have a good friendship. Hell, we’ve been managing it thus far here. You are in a much better place than you were ten years ago. Probably a better place than even five years ago. Returning home is going to be good for you.”

“And if they don’t want me?”

“Then you accept that people change and move on. But, when it comes to me and you, Dimitri, the past is the past. I mean that with every bit of feeling I could put behind it. We are not defined by our dreams.”

“But you-”

“We fought in the same war, Dimitri. Maybe I didn’t lose my mind, but it was still a war. I had Teach on my side, every step of the way. Maybe, it would have been different if they had chosen you or, hell, if they had taught Edelgard’s class. We can keep questioning and debating but-”

“The past is the past.” Dimitri smiled, closing his eyes. “And we are friends.”

Claude lets out a laugh and Dimitri could picture the smile that would follow it. “Now you’re getting it.”

“Who was it that visited you before we left?”

Claude clicked his tongue. “A man has to keep a few secrets when he has horses in the race. I have a feeling that they’re going to be coming back, though. Maybe you’ll get a chance to talk with them.”

“And how long do you plan on staying in Fodlan?” Dimitri shifted, wondering a moment too late why he would ask Claude. It wasn’t like he needed to know.

Claude hesitated. “I suppose I’ll stay as long as I need to. Which means I’ll have to find lodgings and the-”

“I still have access to a property, if you need a place to stay,” Dimitri murmured, “unless they got rid of everything. But, the title should have gone to Felix-”

“You gave him a house?”

Dimitri cleared his throat, looking away. “When my father set up the wills, he had asked if there was anyone in particular that would benefit. And I left… several things to Felix. We were good friends, and I thought… if anything were to happen, it would be best if he…”

Claude reached over, patting his shoulder. “Well, if it’s a place to stay, I wouldn’t say know.”

“I will speak with Rodrigue when we return, he should have the documents.”

The pair let the silence settle around them, Dimitri closing his eyes in an attempt to sleep. He felt comforted with the conversation behind him, a warmth blossoming in his chest to fill the dread of returning.

*~*~*~*~*

“So, is this Rodrigue the very same as the one we knew?”

Claude glanced over at Dimitri as he drove, music humming along in the background. They were forty five minutes out, the GPS giving steady instructions when they needed to turn.

Dimitri gave him a half shrug, eyes locked on the trees passing them. “If he is, he never spoke of it. He was a private man.”

Claude let out a hum. “I suppose we’ll know in short order if he is or not.”

Dimitri fiddled with the phone in his hand. He picked a number out, peering at the name. He hesitated before he clicked call, holding the phone to his ear. Behind him, Dedue looked up from his puzzle book, setting it to the side.

Dimitri drummed his fingers against the car door, shifting as he heard the phone ring. He kept his gaze trained on the trees, back straight.

“Hello?”

The voice picked up on the last ring, Dimitri closing his eyes. “Good afternoon, Rodrigue.” He hesitated, Claude reaching out and patting his leg. He took in a breath, letting out slowly. “It’s me, Dimitri. How have you been?”

He shifted as the silence lengthened, glancing at Claude. The man met his gaze, giving him a nod.

“Rodrigue?” Dimitri ventured, hearing the sigh that seemed to flood through the connection.

“It really is you, isn’t it Dimitri?” Rodrigue asked and Dimitri shifted.

“Yes, I suppose it is me. I… am about half an hour away from your home. May I please stop by and speak with you?”

“Of course. Dimitri, what-”

“We can talk when we’re face to face. We shall see you soon.” Dimitri ended the call, placing the phone back in his pocket. Claude smiled at him, turning his attention back to the road as the light turned green.

“Not a man of many words, is he?” Claude asked.

“No, and neither was Felix.”

Claude let out a hum. “Have you thought about what you would say to him?”

Dimitri closed his eyes, resting his head against the window. Claude let the question hang between them, unwilling to prod the beast.

*~*~*~*~*

_“Do you regret your actions?”_

_Dimitri shifted in his chair, turning to look at the green haired man across from him. They had been silent for the better part of the appointment, Dimitri lost in his own world while Linhardt napped._

_Now, he was staring at Dimitri with bring eyes._

_“There are many things-”_

_“No, do you regret that you hurt him?” Linhardt asked, raising a hand to stop Dimitri. “Do you regret that you confused him for a brother that doesn’t exist. I’m not asking if you regret your previous life. We have covered that subject. There is not much more to talk about. Do you regret how it has influenced your current path?”_

_Dimitri sat back, narrowing his eyes in confusion. “How it… has influenced my current path?” he repeated, scratching the side of his head. After seven years of working with Linhardt, he understood how the man worked, most days._

_Linhardt nodded, propping his head up on his hand, eyes drifting back to close. “You often talk about the details that you dream of. But, do you feel like you’re running from your current life because you can’t accept that you were a monster?”_

_Dimitri shuddered, drawing in on himself. “The past-”_

_“-is the past.” Linhardt sat up, eyes bright as he stared at Dimitri. “We can only work with what we have now. You have been doing very well these past few months, but you still won’t acknowledge that, where you are now, is because you wanted to be here.”_

_“I don’t understand.”_

_Linhardt nodded. “If you didn’t want to get better, you wouldn’t have kept coming. Even when you were at your worst, you didn’t give up. You kept coming. We have gone over the past with a fine toothed comb. I understand how the past can have an effect on you. You still care for Felix greatly, don’t you?”_

_Dimitri let out a sigh, dropping his shoulders. He had been tense since Linhardt started talking, now he looked away, unwilling to meet his gaze._

_“We dated, briefly, in high school.”_

_“And how did that make you feel?”_

_Dimitri shifted, glancing out the window. “He was… he is…” he paused, swallowing, “Felix is everything that was ever good. And I fear that he will never… wish to speak with me again. As it is, maybe it’s better, having him believe that I am dead.”_

_Linhard shifted, letting out a sigh. “He never thought you were dead. Even when he fought for Claude and Byleth, he believed you would be okay. The night before the battle at Gronder, he argued with Claude until he was blue in the face about who to send to the Kingdom army. He wanted to go and speak with you, try and talk some sense into you. Claude shot him down. But, he went anyway.”_

_“And look at where it got him.”_

_“Every day, we woke up knowing that it could have been our last fight. We only moved from day to day because we understood that death was going to come for us, sooner or later. And death has come for us.” Linhardt yawned. “Do you still love Felix?”_

_Dimitri glanced away, closing his eyes. “I do.”_

_“Claude mentioned that he would be returning to Fodlan soon. Do you plan on going with him?” Linhardt asked._

_Dimitri hesitated, drawing in on himself._

_“If you keep running, you’ll never get better, Dimitri.”_

_Linhardt stood, turning to look out the window._

_“Do you believe I’m stable enough to go?” Dimitri asked._

_Linhardt turned to look at him, smiling. “As long as you keep up with your medications and you keep in touch with reality, you should be fine. Dedue will be going back with you, won’t he?”_

_Dimitri nodded._

_“See if you can set up a system, like when you first attended. Having him there to remind you that you’re here and not there will be a big step. You never answered my first question.”_

_“Which was?”_

_“Do you regret your actions?” Linhardt asked._

_“Yes.”_

_Linhardt nodded, smiling. “Then you know how to not fall into those same patterns. You are a human, nothing more and nothing less.”_

_“How did it end?” Dimitri asked._

_He hummed, glancing towards the clock on the wall. “It ended as it began, with a mystery to be solved. Nemesis woke up and tried to fight, we got him back into the dirt. Byleth stepped in as a ruler, for a short time. Once they worked out all the details, they stepped to the side and elected someone else in their position. The church began to fade to the background. The world moved forward.”_

_Dimitri nodded, closing his eyes and letting out a low sigh. “An ending, neither good nor bad.”_

_“But we can still make the best of our lives now, Dimitri. And staying in Almyra is not moving forward. You’re better, but stagnant. And, as much as I enjoy your company, there really is nothing else I can do for you. But, if you need help, I would more than welcome any call you give me.”_

_“Do you plan on going to Fodlan?” Dimitri asked._

_Linhardt smiled, gaze distant. “Yes, I’ll visit it one day. And that’s time for today. Any questions?”_

_Dimitri looked at him, tilting his head. “Do you have any regrets?”_

_Linhardt laughed, his eyes dancing. “Of course, we wouldn’t be human without regrets, would we?”_

*~*~*~*~*

Dimitri watched the house draw closer, Claude pulling up and parking the car next to the garage. Dedue was already out of the car, stretching and looking at the garden beds in front of the house.

“You ready for this?” Claude asked, glancing at Dimitri.

Dimitri grimaced, turning to open the car door. “I am never ready.”

He stepped out of the car, walking up to the porch.

Rodrigue had always had welcoming arms for his son’s friends. He would take in whichever would show up at the door that night and let them stay, accepting whatever flimsy excuse given. He was kind and gentle, offering peace when the teenagers were full of brittle emotions.

He raised his hand to the door, hearing the porch stair creak under Dedue’s weight. With a comforting nod, Dimitri knocked on the door and took a step back, waiting.

It felt like an eternity before the door was opening. An older version of Rodrigue stood in the doorway, his hair brushed back, a mug of tea in one hand.

“Hello, Rodrigue. It is so good to see you again,” Dimitri breathed. He watched Rodrigue set the cup on the small table by the door, walking forward and pulling Dimitri into a hug, his breath seeming to catch.

“And here I thought… it was some sick joke.” Rodrigue shifted, pulling back to look Dimitri over. “You really did come back from the dead, again.”

Dimitri opened his mouth, Rodrigue shaking his head and letting him go. He turned to look at the other two, Claude having joined them after Rodrigue opened the door.

“And you two are?” he asked.

“Claude, from Almyra. I’m a friend of Dimitri’s.” Claude extended his hand, Rodrigue taking and shaking it with a nod. Claude pulled back, Dimitri hearing the porch creak as he shifted his weight.

“Well, thank you for taking such good care of him, Claude. And yourself?”

“Dedue.” Dedue extended a hand, shaking Rodrigue’s as the man nodded.

“Please, come inside. There’s tea on the stove, if any of you are interested.” Rodrigue stepped back into the house, beckoning them inside. Dimitri was the first to follow, Dedue right behind him. Claude lingered for a moment and Dimitri looked back at him, frowning.

Claude glanced from Dimitri to the building, offering him half a smile.

“Are you coming?” Dimitri asked.

“I think I am going to take a drive around town and see what there is. I’ll be back later.” Claude promised, sliding his hands in his pockets.

“Please, I would love to thank you for bringing Dimitri back.” Rodrigue smiled at Claude, his eyes bright. “Will you at least stay the night?”

Claude nodded, gaze darting to Dimitri and then to Rodrigue. “Yeah, sure. I’ll be back!” He waved at them, Dimitri watching him stride to his car.

“If Claude promises that he will be back, there is no reason to not believe he will strand us,” Dedue murmurs.

Dimitri nods, turning back into the house and closing the door behind him. He looked around, his heart warm with the rush of childhood memories that came back to him.

*~*~*~*~*

“Dimitri.”

Dimitri looked up from the photo album he had been sharing with Dedue, watching as Rodrigue pulled a light jacket from the closet.

“Is there anything you need help with?” Dimitri asked, passing the photo album off to Dedue. Claude was out on one of his visits to town, stating something about a coffee shop. Dimitri tried to shake the feeling off that he was searching for someone, even if he wouldn’t share the details with Dimitri.

“No, I am going to speak with Sylvain today.”

Dimitri nodded, his eyes seeming to go dim as he rolled the sentence in his head. The conversation had, naturally, drifted to Sylvain and Felix the night prior. Claude had stated it was a good idea to let the pair know and Dimitri had seen the gleam in his eye, even as he ran a hand through his hair.

Dimitri tried to ignore the sensation of his stomach lurching as Rodrigue pulled on his shoes.

“Please, if it’s too much hassle-”

Rodrigue shook his head, raising his hand as Dimitri began to speak. “I may not have understood what was going on with Felix when he was younger, or why the pair of you stopped talking so suddenly, but I will not keep the knowledge away from them. Felix was… devastated to hear that you had died. To keep this from him…”

Dimitri nodded, looking away. “Of course, I understand. But we did not part on the… best of terms.”

Rodrigue nodded, glancing from Dimitri to Dedue. “But you mentioned that you had received therapy?”

“Yes, several years of therapy. I am in a much better place than I once was.” Dimitri looked away, meeting Dedue’s stare. The man nodded at him, glancing back down at the book in his lap.

“The time in Almyra did you good.”

Dimitri felt warmth spread through him as Rodrigue placed a hand on his shoulder.

“I am glad that you are back with us, Dimitri.”

Dimitri watched Rodrigue leave, turning back to Dedue. “Do you think that this is the right choice?”

Dedue held up the album, his gaze soft. “You have a strong friendship with Felix, Sylvain, and Ingrid. You may have grown distant, but you are still friends, at the core of it. You were friends in the past as well. A bond like that, spanning years-”

“That ended in a bloody mess.” Dimitri moved to sit next to Dedue once more, bowing his head and closing his eyes. “But, I understand what you mean.”

Dedue nodded, resting a hand on Dimitri’s shoulder before asking about a picture, Dimitri looking at it and smiling.

*~*~*~*~*

Dimitri cradled the cup of tea between his hands as Claude and Dedue bantered back and forth, his gaze trained on the tv. It was on mute, but the colors kept his attention, kept him grounded. In the kitchen, he could see Rodrigue finishing another pot of tea.

In the week that they had been at the Fraldarius house, Dimitri felt that he had drunk his weight in tea. He glanced up as he heard the sound of a motorcycle cut off, his head lifting up. The door was pushed open not more than two minutes later and the pair of friends he had abandoned walked through the door.

His breath caught as his gaze swept over Felix, his hair pulled back in a bun, several strands escaping to frame his face. Felix paused just on the other side of the door, taking stock of the room. Rodrigue had fallen silent, his statement only half finished and Dimitri couldn’t even begin to tell the others what they had been talking about, his gaze pinned on Felix.

He felt like he was both drowning and being offered a life raft in the middle of the storm.

"Good afternoon, dad."

Felix was the first one to break the silence, Rodrigue looking surprised as the pair stepped through the living room and into the dining room. Dimitri watched as Felix’s gaze flicked over the gathered men, Rodrigue holding a picture of water as he stood on the threshold between the kitchen and dining room.

"Ah, hello, Felix, Sylvain! I wasn't..."

"We messaged you," Sylvina commented, his hands in his pockets.

Dimitri shifted as they exchanged greetings, finding himself looking into Felix’s gaze when he looked back. He wondered what Felix was seeing, if he should have let his hair down or if he should have gotten it cut before showing back up. He hadn’t wanted to do anything with it, felt that it was too much of a hassle. But now he wished he had done something with it.

Dimitri swallowed, giving himself a moment to glance at Claude before he centered himself. He could handle just a little meeting and, if Felix still rejected him, then that was the end of that. He could… maybe get the title for the house transferred back into his name and set up a place to live in Fodlan.

He wouldn’t run back to Almyra and continue to hide out there for the rest of his days.

“How have you been?”

Rodrigue looked almost startled as Felix addressed him, his gaze landing on Dimitri briefly before he met his son’s gaze.

“I’m doing well, and yourself?” he asked.

Felix gave him a half shrug, closing his eyes in thought. “I’ve been doing well. Work has been a bit slow, but it is more people being lazy than anything else. It will pick up here soon.”

Dimitri filed the information away, wishing he could hold all the moments together. He hadn’t realized just how much he had missed Felix, not until he was faced with the man himself.

"Is there something on my face?"

Dimitri glanced at Claude, realizing just how hard Sylvain was staring at him. Claude had once asked if Sylvain still hung around Felix. Maybe that was the purpose for the man’s extended stay with Rodrigue, despite how uncomfortable he looked at times with Rodrigue’s pointed staring.

Felix moved towards Sylvain, reaching out to shake him before the man moved on his own accord.

"Well, don't you have the most gorgeous green eyes that I have ever seen."

Dimitri wanted to laugh as Felix shoved him, eyes narrowed. "Really, that's the first nonsense you spout off?" His voice was a hiss, though it rang through the room.

Sylvain opened his mouth, closing it and shaking his head. His eyes were bright, excited and Dimitri was glad to see him.

"With your hair and my eyes, it will be like Christmas twenty four seven." Claude was moving away from the table, invading the personal space of both Sylvain and Felix. Felix looked disgruntled as he took a step back, huffing. Through the whole exchange, Dimitri remained silent while Rodrigue just shook his head, turning into the kitchen and fetching two more pairs of glasses.

"At least-" Syvlain began.

"Please, the first thing he told me was, 'you don't have green eyes'." Felix scoffed, shaking his head. "I can't imagine he's changed much since then."

Claude smiled, taking a step closer to Sylvain and resting a hand on his shoulder. Dimitri couldn’t hear what the man said, but they retreated. Felix rolled his eyes, turning to look at the others at the table.

“Dimitri, Dedue. It is good to see that your knack for avoiding death has.... continued.” 

Dimitri shifted under the words, hearing Felix’s foot tapping against the floor. He wouldn’t be surprised if the man had no desire to stay, now that Sylvain had left the room.

“Is there a chance we could speak in private?” Dimitri asked, voice soft and Felix tensed.

Dimitri had tried to explain, locked in the cage of his mind, when they were fifteen. But the words never came out. He had never been able to explain to Felix what was going on in his head. That had hurt more than even Dimitri was willing to admit.

“No.”

“Felix.”

Felix turned, staring at the front door. “I came here for Sylvain, nothing else.”

Dimitri felt himself crumble on the inside, closing his eyes. He understood that it was a long shot, but he had hoped...

“I am glad that you and Sylvain have each other, even after all these years. But Felix, please, may we talk?” Dimitri tried once more, recalling Linhardt’s words. The things he had been taught to keep him present.

Felix turned, eyes cold as he looked down at Dimitri. Dedue moved to the right of Dimitri and he frowned, just the barest of frowns. Rodrigue was still standing in the kitchen, his face white.

“I would hold no words for a man so driven by the ghosts of the dead than those of the living, _Dimitri_. You are welcome to run and hide, to grovel to the dead. But I will be no part of it.”

Dimitri wanted to recoil at the anger spilled into the words, his eyes distant as he swallowed down his pride, approaching Felix. He was aware of Rodrigue watching them, wary that something bad was going to happen.

Felix turned, jerking away from Dimitri when he got too close, his eyes blazing in anger. Dimitri rested a hand on his shoulder anyway, terrified of losing him. He wanted nothing more than to hold Felix close and apologize.

Felix had given Dimitri a similar look, when he had failed to recognize where he was or who he was with. He had fled, chased away with so much anger, he had wanted to go home and crawl under a rock and never return.

“Felix.”

Felix pulled himself out of Dimitri’s grip, taking several steps back. Dimtri saw how close he was to the front door and he tried to find the words that would keep Felix there, keep him close. But he couldn’t think of anything.

“I find it curious,” Felix said after a moment, “that you managed to stay with Claude of all people.”

“We agreed that the past is the past, Felix. The last thing I remember you telling me, I remember hearing, was that you loved me. What happened to that? What happened to us?” Dimitri had opened his mouth, unsure of what would fall out and he knew the words were wrong, no matter how softly spoken.

Feflix shook his head, hands trembling even as they were clenched at his sides. “You don’t-”

Dimitri tried to guess as to what Felix had meant to say, but he was yanking the door open, slamming it shut behind him. Dimitri felt Dedue’s hand on his shoulder, his legs going weak as he was guided back to the table.

“You have the worst ability to say exactly what you shouldn’t.”

Dimitri placed his head in his hands, hearing the motorcycle start up and take off. Claude entered the house a moment later, running his hand through his hair and surprisingly Sylvain-less.

Rodrigue set the pitcher down, excusing himself from the awkward air that settled around and heading into his bedroom, shutting the door with a soft click.

*~*~*~*~*

“If you keep calling him, he’ll block your number.”

Dimitri looked up as Claude sat in the chair across from him. Dedue and Rodrigue were gone from the house, mentioning something about dinner preparations.

“I am… surprised he still has the same number as when we were teenagers.” Dimitri set the phone down, Claude shaking his head.

“It’s not that rare for people to keep their phone numbers. Don’t forget, you’re a dead man walking. You have to get a new everything because of that. Different circumstances for you. When I was over there the other day, Felix seemed to be doing well for himself. He’s… well, still an angry, emotionally dense man, but.”

“He is happier without me, then.”

“No, no I don’t think he is. He’s surviving. You two… you have something, don’t you know?” Claude quirked an eyebrow, watching as Dimitri pulled in on himself. “I think it’ll work out.”

“And if it doesn’t?”

Claude smiled at him, Dimitri rolling his eyes. He lifted a hand, running it through his hair in thought. “If you two could just talk, I think it will.”

“Do you…” Dimitri hesitated, taking in the man that had been a good companion for the last ten years. He glanced away, Claude tilting his head.

“You have that look on your face.”

Dimitri glanced at him, frowning. “What look?”

“Like you’re about to ask something you actually know the answer to, but can’t bring yourself to ask. So, just ask me anyway. What’s on your mind?”

Dimitri shook his head, looking towards the kitchen. “Do you think Rodrigue knows?”

“I’m sure he does. He met Teach at one point, didn’t he? When we were dealing with Miklan. And, with the way he reacted when Sylvain and Felix were here.” Claude glanced at Dimitri, a smile coming to his face. “You know what you might benefit from?”

“No.”

Claude fished in his pocket, pulling out the flyer he had taken from the coffee shop. “The Golden Days.”

“What is that?”

Claude grinned. “Our good friend Lorenz created a group specifically for those that remember Edelgard’s war. It’s exclusive. You have to be able to name one thing that only Lorenz would know, as it gets… lively, shall we say? And the one rule is you’re not allowed to yell at each other for past happenings. No fighting allowed.”

Dimitri took the flyer warily, setting it on the table like it might bite him. He looked over the information, glancing back up at Claude. “And how would I prove that I am… me?” he asked.

Claude tapped the side of his nose. “I have already spoken with Lorenz and secured myself a position in the club. All you need is an outstanding recommendation to join the club.”

“And how would this help with my… Felix problems?” Dimitri asked, swallowing back the fear that seemed to rise up in him.

Claude just grinned. “It may not help, but! It will get you together with the other Bue Lions. From what Lorenz says, Mercedes and Ashe are regular attendees. Of course, there was a warning not to eat anything that Mercedes may provide. She- well, I just wouldn’t suggest eating anything from her unless you can be sure it’s clean.”

“Uhm…” Dimitri looked at him, Claude smiling back.

“You and Dedue should both come. It would be good for you. Get to meet more of the people from our timeline.”

Dimitri nodded, closing his eyes. “Very well. I will consider going.”

“Well, the next meet-up is tonight at seven thirty. We would have to leave here about seven in order to make it to the tea house.”

Dimitri stared at Claude when he spoke, shaking himself. “Do you really think-” he began.

Claude just smiled at him. “If there’s anything I believe, it’s that you won’t be turned away from the meeting. Honestly, I think it would do you good. And, from what Lorenz said, it would be good to have more of our classmates there.”

Dimitri sighed, letting his shoulders droop before he nodded. “Very well, I shall… consider it. Let me know when you need to leave.”

Claude nodded, sitting back in the chair with a grin. Dimitri wanted to squirm under that gaze, knowing that the man had won.

*~*~*~*~*

Dimitri looked up at the building Claude had stopped at, his stomach turning.

“Maybe this was-” he began.

Claude shook his head. “You don’t have to stay for the whole thing, just long enough to check out who’s here. If you feel uncomfortable at any point, you can return to the car and wait for the meeting to be over. No one is going to be angry at you if you do leave.”

Dedue was already out of the car, Claude giving Dimitri a smile.

“...very well.” Dimitri got out of the car, looking at the tea house. A sign stated that it was closed for the evening, Claude ignoring it and pushing the door open. They made their way back to the room that was lit up, voices spilling out with laughter following.

Dimitri hesitated at the threshold, Dedue resting a hand on his shoulder.

“You do not have to force yourself to come, if you do not wish to.” He took his hand from Dimitri’s shoulder, stepping into the room. The voices went quiet, Claude right behind Dedue and Dimitri shifted.

“Claude?”

“No way!”

“Where have you been-”

Dimitri followed behind, taking a few seconds to gather himself as Claude was bombarded by what looked to be most of the original Golden Deer class.

The room had several chairs and couches pulled into it, a few tables pushed to the back that held tea cups and snacks, with paper plates to the side. Lorenz sat in a singular chair, a small coffee table to his left, already hosting several glasses on it. To the right of him, Leonie was lounging, taking a sip from her mug.

Hilda and Marianne were sharing half a couch, Marianne smiling as Claude answered a question Dimitri didn’t quite catch. Next to Marianne, Ignatz sat with a sketchbook balancing on his knees.

Raphael was missing, Dimitri noticed, as his gaze found Mercedes and Annette, the pair of women giggling as Mercedes split a cookie with her. Dorothea sat on the floor, leaning against Ferdinand as the man made a comment.

Upon seeing Dedue, the others faltered, Dimitri nearly taking a step back but feeling a hand on his shoulder.

“Wow, I did not expect this many people here tonight.”

Sylvain’s voice was like a rope and Dimitri glanced over his shoulder to see Felix, eyes narrowed in anger, staring at him.

Lorenz looked up at Sylvain, his eyes narrowing in disdain. “You are the one that is always mocking my tea house, Sylvain. What are you doing here?”

“Ah, well, Claude extended an invitation that I couldn’t refuse. And you know how he is with that tongue of his.”

Dimitri was grateful to see Lorenz’s complection turn bright red.

“Seriously, Sylvain? Do you ever try to keep it in your head?”

Ingrid’s voice was punctual, the woman looking up from her spot near Ashe, the pair to the left of Lorenz, rather than the right.

“It looks like we’re almost all together, huh?” Claude asked, bringing the attention back to himself. Dimitri relaxed as everyone turned to look at Claude, the man smiling.

“Yes, I suppose so.” Lorenz sniffed, glancing at the newcomers. “Had I known we would have so many people, I would have used one of the bigger rooms.”

“Heh, sorry about that. Leonie didn’t mention if you had to RSVP or not, so we thought we’d just show up.” Sylvain shrugged, Dimitri sliding to the side and taking up an unoccupied corner. Mercedes turned to look at him, a smile on her face.

“Would you like a cookie?”

Dimitri opened his mouth, glancing at the others. He quickly shook his head no, shrinking down in himself as the others decided that he wasn’t of much interest after all. The air settled into much more relaxed, Mercedes passing around the cookies, of which half the people declined due to reasons of needing to drive afterwards.

“Dimitri.”

Dimitri looked up when Felix spoke, his heart twisting as the man moved closer to him. It was over an hour into the start of the party, several different reactions to him being there, and a twenty minute period of getting used to all of the people being in one room.

So fair, Dimitri thought he had been doing pretty well.

“Felix.” He angled himself to look at him, his gaze guarded as Felix leaned against the wall next to him. He had forced himself to be content with leaving Felix just one voice mail, apologizing and explaining. He had written out everything he had wanted to say, everything that would be pretty, but when it had come to leaving the actual voice mail, it had been rather ugly and awkward.

“I wanted to let you know I got your voicemail.”

Dimitri nodded, feeling Dedue’s gaze on him. The man was sitting with Mercedes and Annette, talking over the recipes they had gathered in the past ten years. It was nice to see everyone like this, nice to replace the memories of blood and war with bright, happy people.

“I-”

Felix held up a hand, shaking his head. “Let’s… just start slow. Hi, I’m Felix.” He stuck his hand out, Dimitri looking down at it before looking up at him.

He smiled, reaching out and taking it. “Hello, I’m Dimitri and it’s a pleasure to meet you.”

He could feel eyes on them, but he could ignore it, for the sake of watching the blush creep up Felix’s neck more. With a grunt, Felix dropped his hand, turning away and taking a breath.

“Want to be friends?” Dimitri asked, his stomach turning as Felix opened his mouth before he nodded, shoving his hands in his pockets.

“Sure, friends.”

Dimitri felt his stomach turn, warmth and happiness spreading through him as he broke off to get them a bottle of water each, feeling confident that they could repair their friendship.

**Author's Note:**

> Hubert should be next. To take a break and dive into some different scenery.


End file.
